When The Internet Raps

this came up when I searched for “internet rap”

When the internet raps it usually sounds like this retarded bullshit that this dumb broad Uffie makes. My assumptions about this girl maybe wrong but her sucking ass at music is not wrong. This girl discovered rapping by getting hip to MIA and grime music…oh and of course every hipsters favorite, the dirty south. Since she can’t rap for shit, old lady in the wedding singer got more style than this girl, she has decided to add vocal effects to make her crap rhymes sound avant garde. Some internetters think she makes cool shit, those internetters are fucking stupid. Sideswept bangs to not make you a rapstar, hipstar maybe.

Sometimes when the internet raps it sounds like Cadence Weapon. From his humble beginnings as a shitty rap reviewer for pitchfork Rollie has blossomed into a majestic internet rapstar. Unlike Uffie, Rollie actually knows a little something about rapping and as a result his raps do not sound like total shit. He has recently released a brand new rap album that I don’t know the name of because in true blogger fashion I downloaded the fuck out of his record. I never really checked any of the Cadence Weapon joints that he posted on the Razorblade Runner blog, like I knew dude made music but I never really checked what he was about. In my mind he was just this blogger who happened to rap and I didn’t care to much. So I get my hands on his shit and much to my own surprise it’s been getting some play around these parts. He’s got a little of that pop and glitch going down on some tracks which is cool. A lot of times that shit gets on my nerves but with tracks like Diamond Cutter that are filled with fun static and raps about a girl that wants to fuck I can cope with it. My favorite joints are Black Hand and Julie Will Jump The Broom. I’m feeling that Black Hand beat. It’s not anything super fancy some loops and this ridiculously corny horn but I’m all about. Oh Grim Fandango is also a dope cut, check that shit.

For those expecting mp3’s fuck that shit. Go peep his site and/or blog, dude puts up enough of his own shit for you to get your fill. Or just buy the goddamn record.

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